Stanford Chaparral


“The fourth bypass surgery is the worst,” Tom said halfheartedly.

“I’m trying to fashion a tourniquet!” Tom said staunchly.

“I dismembered a street urchin last night,” Tom said disjointedly.

“I’m really sorry. It’s never happened before,” Tom said softly.

“It’s high time to exploit Chinese manual labor,” Tom said coolly.

“We need to bury that body and pretend this never happened,” Tom said gravely.

“I’ve been on welfare for six years,” Tom said dolefully.

“I’ve failed as a prospector,” Tom deadpanned.

“Accutane has its drawbacks,” Tom said sebaceously.