Our particular story occurs in Sugarland, Texas, on the outskirts of Houston. But on the last day of American independence, similar scenes played out all across the once-proud nation...

Can I get you a beer Ted?

10-4, good buddy.

So how is the trailer coming?

Well, I reckon it's all going okay. Once I get the al-u-min-ium siding up, I'll be finished with the exterior.

Hold on. Say Aluminum again.

Al-u-min-ium.

You're doing it again

Doing what old chap?

Ahhh! Where did that monocle come from?

This my grandfather's, from his days at Eton, passed down to me.

Eton?

Well of course old boy. All of the Wesleysmiths of Throppingshamshire go there.

What are talking about? You've lived in Sugarland all your life, Ted.

Wot?

Sugarland. In Houston. In Texas.

Ah, but of course, Sam Houston's country in the new world. I thought I had a spot of trouble placing your accent there fellow.

Ted, we're in Texas right now. I don't know what sort of game you're playing but I'm getting really freaked out here man.

Hah! You must be having a bit of sport with me. Clearly the ancestral manse of the Wesleysmiths is not in this Texas you speak so fondly of.

[Runs outside] Where did my truck and guns go? What happened to all the electricity and the burriteria down the street? Ted, what the hell is going on.

[Comes outside as well] I also do not know this 'Ted' of whom you speak. I have been Giles Weseleysmith for all my life and Lord Throppingshamshire since my father passed on.

This must be some sort of nightmare.

There, there old friend. Buck up. Stiff upper lip and all.

NOOOOOOO!!!!

...and thus once all the sleepers were re-activated, England easily re-conquered its rebellious American colonies. God save the Queen.

The end.